Trying to find some wise words of wisdom to talk myself in to believing that I can
out funk this day. It's just so blah! 4 hours in the Infusion Center with the man-child doesn't help. He is one of the healthiest "chronic" people here. There are a lot worse things going on, on floors just above and right below me. It makes me thank God it's just Chron's. So, that is positive. Slightly less ho-hum than being crabby about being here for Monday afternoon. Happy little boys so excited to be getting the hell out of the hospital , who hug you and tell you that you smell pretty, also doesn't suck!
Then why do most (or all) Mondays just suck! There has never been ( for me) nor will there ever be ( because I know everything) a good Monday. Has anyone even ever wrote a happy song about Monday? Is there anything even slightly delightful about Monday to write even a little ditty? FUCK NO! There's your answer. But if someone know's of one, I'll take a listen & see what it says. Equal opportunity hater here! I can't get it together. My get up & go, got up & went somewhere and I'm pretty sure that there is no returning address! So what the hell am I gonna do, I have a 4 miler next Monday night & my first half (13.1 long ass)miles in about 5 weeks. And the only thing that keeps popping in my head is this...
This phrase of unknown origin speaks to me. About a million, things but mostly the need to feel content, to be safe, have my health, be the best mother,wife,lover, daughter, sister, friend, etc......And waiting for the other shoe to drop. WTF is with that? I feel my best me when I'm whole 30 eating,blog writing, race running, SUV full of sporting equipment, me. So, why do I fight it? Doubt it? Even sabotage it? ( que the Beastie Boys Sabotage) I push back so hard and let things,big or small, steal that from me. It's essentially the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. And I think neither of them have a clue between them of what the hell is going on with me!
It gets better. It always does. Turns out today is actually National Margarita Day. Not to bad for a Monday. Definitely makes Monday night looking a whole lot more palatable now that I know there is tequila involved. Maybe I will actually finish this aimless blog and enjoy the evening. As of this moment, things are looking very suspect. The Littlest won't quit telling me how good my margarita looks and even though the hubs is preparing a totally delicious Paleo friendly dinner of carne asada street-style tacos, my cravings are a little more savage! I could absolutely take down a box of Girl Scout Cookies and cold piece of my 15lb lasagna, while watching Wives with Knives with no pants on! I won't. Because, to quote Dr.House, "Slutty party girl is fun,til she pukes on her shoes--then she's just a pain in the ass". I don't want to be the slutty pain in the ass party girl. Well, at least not on a Monday!
Tuesday will come and I will be better, right? It will be. Already one margarita in, 7 boys feasting on quesadillas, soft tacos, hard tacos and guacamole. No tv. No practices. The hubs and I will eat alone once the savages are satiated. Presently, the most important thing in the entire world is that Bob's Kroger 86'd the Choco Taco and their childhoods are now ruined. If that is the first thing that comes to their minds when considering life altering childhood memories, is the lack of Choco Tacos, I might actually get that "mother of the year award" just yet! *lights flickering*
Take Care of You......
p.s. whilst proofreading this, I immediately remembered why, I will never be mother of the year. Why? Because my kids never shut the hell up & I can't gag them!
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