I was so nervous the few days leading up to the race. My training got wonky due to pneumonia & Lupus making a lovely appearance for no reason. It was ravaging not just my training but my mental game plan. I had myself psyched up, freaked out, rocking in the fetal position and reaching out for a life line! Cheese & Rice, thank you for the divine intervention of my running friends at MRTT. Between the high priestess of all things positive and reaffirming & my Fit Chick Food lovie who is a bad ass, I felt like I wasn't going to die. I also had some pretty good motivation/distractions & my hugely supportive running wifey! I am going to kick this races ass right after I do all the things I have to do to make sure that if I do die, the kids will have clean under wear for a week and everybody will be good on probiotics & multivitamins!
Packets picked up, race clothes laid out, running game plan mapped out, alarms set, life will go on in the case of my demise for at least a week, and the hubs is making me the best possible Gluten Free Carb loaded protein packed meal. Now, I'm left to take the advice of the leader of the MRTT pack (aka high priestess of my running sanity) and dedicate each mile to someone . To stay focused. OK. I can do that. I haven't wrote in my journal in a while. Kill two birds with one stone. Fucking nightmare. Crying through journal entry. Nice! Designating the miles, damn near hysterical! This is just perfect. I love feeling all these feelings!
NO, NOT EVER. So, here is the list. My blurb behind why & what really happened!
*this is long, sappy, foul mouthed, gross and not for everybody YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED*
1. Drew Scott -why: my first love,learning experience,heart break &saving grace
really: these people are going to run me off this pot holey ass road
2. Carter Joseph- why: hes overcome so much. so can I.
really: it's so windy. I can't stop coughing. I may puke!
3. Brady Robert- why: my 5k running heart of gold who saved my life
really: I almost puked on that chick, maybe will get off my ass now!
4. Ayden Randall-why: the final piece of my puzzle & my favorite miles to run
really: holy shit 4 miles! I'm killing this.
5. Noah Walker- why: I'm his NerNer. He's my Noey. I'm so happy to have him here in MI
really: It is not cold anymore. I'm thirsty. My wifey's choice in energy food...ewwww
6. My Sister - why: This is my farthest race I've ever run & she is the one I know will be there no matter how far I go.
really: Hell yes! Half way! (until the cop at the mile marker say "just let you ladies know the first person has finished", Fuck that guy!)
7. Squad- why: there are so many awesome women & men in my life that have supported me when I have been sick,healthy, running, not running, fat,skinny, miserable, happy! Seven is lucky and I'm very lucky!
really: it's getting really cold again and I'm cramping up. WTF is this pain...I'm done...I'm texting Kevin.
8.Dad & Judy- why: So glad that love is us getting passed 8 years of stubborn. Happy that's all over!
really: The hubs & the boys surprised me. I cry. Can't quit now. I call on my inner Eminem, "I'm gonna turn around with a great smile, and walk my white ass back across 8 mile.....
9.Ray & Chris- why: more like my big brother and sister than uncle & aunt. Best family & friends ever.
really: If my running wife tries to feed me one more nasty jelly bean i'm going to stab her!
10&11. Kevin- why: the "hubs" for eleventy million things. Because we never know how long we have been married. Because he is my best friend and spoils me rotten. Because he knew if I made it this far I was never backing down. Mostly because he put up with all ME every damn day!
really: this is the farthest I have ever run. I can just be ok with quitting. Its still an accomplishment. But damn it! Those kids are at this mile too. And then, the airplane hanger with the music and the cute boys in the white Lamborghini. Fuck......I CAN'T QUIT!
12. Laura Miller-why: I don't people. But when you meet someone and instantly it's love at first sight! You hold on tight. We became family fast and I can't stand going days with out seeing her face. Running, lifting, laughing, steaming, drinking, fowling, eating, pedis,....I could
go on for ever. She is amazing!
really: uphill in the wind, or at least if feels like it, plus I'm carrying a dead body. I swear to Jeebus Crust! Oh no, that's my frozen thunder thighs. I'm just more of a 10k runner, this is stupid.
13. my mother- why: I've wrapped a lot of the last 13 years trying to heal from losing you. It will happen. You always loved to watch me run. Well, I'm running now!
really:We made it! Are you kidding me? I didn't die? I'm going to hug Laura so hard she pukes. I can't wait to sit down. I hope I can stand back up. I wonder if there is a half I can do in June?
.1 the rest of you- why: if you have given me bullshit, hid bullshit, tried to sell me bullshit, lied to me about your bullshit, included me in your bullshit, or just quit me over some bullshit. I've let it go. I don't give a single fuck about you or any of it any more. I left all of it in that one .1 mile. Be happy,be miserable, just be something other than trying to steal my joy. Because I left all of it right there.
really: TRUE STORY
Take Care of You.......